A Few Words About Bullying
October is starting out to be challenging.
A squirrel spinning tail aggravating start of the week for me. And here I am breaking a rule I have to not vent about personal issues. Stunned to almost tears issue.
I asked a person who I believe has experience dealing with people with behavorial issues in a variety of situations, for advice. The reply is helpful, except for the part about a victim of bullying maybe has a control issue with the bully person.
The victim of a bully is never at fault.
My Opinion:
There is a fine line between who is a bully and who is being a rude and/or pushy person.
When you feel you have to limit what you do around the person because they might not like it, get angry, get nasty, it may feel like you are being bullied. Living in fear isn't good.
If the person knows they are upsetting you, and continues their pushy behavior, then that slides into bullying.
Compassion is first. After that, it is time to say enough is enough, and find a solution that takes you out of harm's way.
Seek help from a professional therapist or a trusted friend.
And when they double down if you stand up to them, sure marker.
ReplyDeleteLiz,
ReplyDeleteNot sure what sure marker is. I think you mean that make a bully come after to you more. What I deal with is not nice when confronted, but does back off for a while.
A sure marker means a confirmation that you're dealing with a bully.
ReplyDeleteThank you Liz!
ReplyDeleteI get it now. Confrontation is not a pleasant experience.
If someone keeps doing or saying something they have been told upsets you, red flags should go up! Run don’t walk away!
ReplyDeleteMarie,
ReplyDeleteThat is good advice.
Not always easy to follow, but I try.
I agree with the previous comments. When red flags flash, you know it's time to take serious action.
ReplyDeleteLorrie,
ReplyDeleteRed flags are heeded.
I think the situation is settled and fading.
People seem to think that once we become adults that bullying will stop and it's simply not the case. Sometimes we can walk away but other times it's not an option and we're forced to deal. I hope whatever/whoever is causing you angst realizes the error of their ways.
ReplyDeleteBullying seems to be ever increasing. and the definitions have changed -- along with how we handle it. This is a very thoughtful post.
ReplyDeleteMaryanne,
ReplyDeleteWatching Tik Tok reels is an eye opener as to how people behave. Karen videos, for example, use to be funny. Not anymore because those people are real. I feel sorry for nice people named Karen.
What I am dealing with is a walk away from a toxic person. I'm good with doing that.
Jeanie,
ReplyDeleteOne of the worse things about situations dealing with bully types, pushy people is being told you are part of the problem. It takes being insulted to another level.
Folks need to be informed how to deal with bullying in the adult sphere.
It's been a rare issue for me.
ReplyDeleteWilliam,
ReplyDeleteThat is good to know.